Practicing trauma-informed parenting | Robyn Koslowitz, PhD | TEDxUnion Women

Quick Overview

Robyn Koslowitz, PhD, shares that overcoming trauma responses, like panic attacks and emotional dysregulation stemming from childhood trauma, requires actively reprogramming the brain's default threat detection system (the Amygdala and the Default Mode Network) by consciously choosing to be present and setting boundaries, rather than letting the trauma 'app' run automatically.

Key Points: The speaker experienced panic attacks and intrusive thoughts following the death of her father when she was ten, leading to a long-term struggle with undiagnosed PTSD. Trauma is defined not as a scar, but as software (the Default Mode Network or DMN) that runs automatically, causing the brain's threat response center (the Amygdala) to activate inappropriately. When the DMN is activated by a trigger, it overrides the prefrontal cortex, leading to feelings of unsafety, panic, and an inability to think logically or act according to one's values. The speaker advocates for actively 'reclaiming' psychological resources from the trauma app by consciously choosing to stay present, breathe, and set boundaries, rather than giving in to the trauma response. Children of parents who are people-pleasers or who have functional alcoholism often learn to say 'yes' when they mean 'no' to keep everyone calm, which mirrors trauma responses. The solution involves consciously reprogramming the DMN by practicing saying 'no' and setting boundaries, even when it feels uncomfortable or triggers guilt, allowing the prefrontal cortex to regain control.

Context: The presentation is from a TEDxUnion Women event featuring speakers focused on themes of Healing, Identity, and Innovation. Robyn Koslowitz, PhD, shares a deeply personal story about navigating life with undiagnosed Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) that began after a significant childhood event (her father's death at age 10). She explains the neurological basis of trauma responses, contrasting the reactive Amygdala activation with the rational Prefrontal Cortex, and offers a practical, self-directed method for regaining control over these automatic threat responses.