Is A Woman Like A Car?

Quick Overview

Jordan Peterson argues against advising people to avoid cohabitation before marriage, stating that such advice lacks factual evidence and that people who cohabit before marriage are statistically more likely to divorce, suggesting that the relationship structure itself, not the cohabitation, is the issue.

Key Points: Peterson advises against the common advice to avoid cohabitation before marriage, calling it "a kind of pragmatic common sense" that lacks factual evidence. Statistical evidence suggests that couples who live together before marriage are more likely to divorce than those who do not. The core problem is not cohabitation itself, but the potential presence of underlying factors like antisocial behavior, psychopathic traits, or a lack of commitment that lead to both cohabitation and later divorce. If a couple vows commitment publicly, but their actions (or lack thereof) suggest otherwise, that vow is subject to intense pressure and doubt. He suggests that people who are not genuinely committed or who exhibit traits like psychopathy/narcissism are more likely to engage in casual relationships or cohabitation without full commitment. The fundamental issue lies in the lack of genuine, unwavering faith/commitment, rather than the pre-marital living arrangement.

Context: The video captures a segment of a discussion or interview, likely featuring Jordan Peterson alongside an interviewer (a woman seen reading from a phone initially, then listening). The conversation revolves around the common relationship advice concerning cohabitation before marriage, with Peterson challenging the premise that avoiding it guarantees a better outcome.

Detailed Analysis

Jordan Peterson directly addresses the question of advising against cohabitation before marriage. He contends that the simple answer often given—that there is plenty of evidence it is a bad idea—is flawed because it relies on a superficial understanding. Peterson cites statistics showing that people who live together before marriage are statistically more likely to divorce, but argues this correlation is not causal. He suggests that the underlying factors, such as antisocial behavior, psychopathic tendencies, or a lack of genuine commitment, are the real predictors of divorce. He points out that if a couple makes a public vow of commitment (like marriage) but lacks true faith or commitment, that vow itself is precarious. The core issue, according to Peterson, is the inherent instability and lack of genuine commitment, which manifests in patterns like serial casual relationships or cohabitation without full dedication. He concludes that trying to simulate commitment through cohabitation before marriage does not work, and the true test is whether one can step forward into the unknown future with faith, and that the absence of this faith is what makes relationships unstable.