# Why 1000’s of Women Are CHASING “Nice Guys” & AVOIDING High Value Men (18,000 Surveyed) Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HcHesyWVri0 Recap page: https://rapidrecap.app/video/HcHesyWVri0 Generated: 2025-12-02T21:06:58.09+00:00 --- ## Quick Overview Women are chasing "mid guys"—men who are real, present, relatable, and not obsessively focused on perfection—because they are tired of the exhausting pretense and insecurity masked by the curated perfection of high-value men, which creates intimacy-killing intimidation. **Key Points:** - The key advantage of "mid guys" is that they are approachable, allowing women to feel comfortable and be themselves without pressure to maintain a facade. - Mid guys are present, dedicating time to dates, conversations, and actually living, unlike 'perfect guys' who are too focused on optimizing everything. - Women prefer relatability; mid guys admit flaws (like being terrible at cooking) and don't pretend to have everything figured out, which women find endearing. - Mid guys are not afraid to look stupid, share vulnerabilities, or be uncurated on social media, contrasting with perfect guys whose curated lives create intimidation. - Perfect guys often carry baggage because they are exhausted maintaining their perfect image, leaving no emotional space for a real relationship. - The biggest takeaway is that a man's 'normalness' or authenticity is his advantage, as women want real connection over the impression of flawlessness. ![Screenshot at 0:12: The speaker introduces the concept of "The Mid Guys" who are real and not striving for perfection, contrasting them with men who feel the need to be perfect to attract women.](https://ss.rapidrecap.app/screens/HcHesyWVri0/00-00-12.png) **Context:** This video, presented by Marni Kinrys of Wing Girl Method, addresses why many women are attracted to and pursue 'mid guys' (average, non-perfect men) rather than seemingly 'high-value' men who strive for an unattainable level of perfection in every aspect of life. The speaker references a survey of 18,000 women to support her argument that authenticity and presence are more attractive qualities than curated perfection. ## Detailed Analysis The speaker argues that men who strive for constant perfection—perfect body, perfect career, perfect life—are actually not the ones women are choosing. Women are instead attracted to "mid guys" who are real, present, relatable, and not obsessed with flawlessness. The speaker outlines five key advantages mid guys possess: 1) They are approachable, making women feel safe to be themselves without needing to perform perfection. 2) They are present, making time for actual dating and conversation rather than just optimizing their lives. 3) They are relatable because they admit their struggles and imperfections (like being bad at cooking), which women find endearing rather than intimidating. 4) They are not trying too hard; their lives and social media posts are not perfectly curated, which is more impressive than constantly trying to prove how great they are. 5) They have room in their lives for a partner because they are not so self-focused on maintaining their image. Ultimately, the speaker concludes that a man's 'normalness' is his advantage; women are tired of fake perfection and want authenticity, which fosters true intimacy. ### Defining 'Mid Guys' - Not perfect, ambitious, or aiming for the top tier - They are normal, real, not pretending to be flawless - Not obsessed with perfection or mediocrity in effort ### Advantage #1 - They're Approachable: Women don't feel they have to be perfect around them - Creates safety, which fosters attraction - Allows women to be themselves (messy hair, no makeup) ### Advantage #2 - They're Present: Not too busy optimizing everything - They have time for dates, conversations, and actually living life ### Advantage #3 - They're Relatable: They have bad days and struggle - They are willing to be real about their struggles, giving women permission to be real too - Fosters intimacy ### Advantage #4 - They're Not Trying So Hard: Everything is not curated (photos, stories) - They post things that are actually funny, interesting, or real - They are not trying to look perfect; they just are themselves ### Advantage #5 - They Have Room For Her In Their Lives: Their ego isn't so big that there is no room for someone else - They are not overly focused on themselves - They prioritize a partner over their optimized life ### How to Win as a 'Mid' - 1. Own your own life, stop apologizing for not being extraordinary - 2. Be comfortable with imperfection, share and laugh about flaws - 3. Stop curating everything, post real stuff - 4. Focus on connection, not impression (plan real dates) - 5. Have your own life, but don't optimize it so much that there is no room for a partner ![Screenshot at 0:05: The speaker establishes the premise by stating she will blow the viewer's mind regarding the men who are actually winning at dating: 'the mid guys'.](https://ss.rapidrecap.app/screens/HcHesyWVri0/00-00-05.png) ![Screenshot at 0:47: The introduction slide appears, identifying the speaker as Marni Kinrys of Wing Girl Method.](https://ss.rapidrecap.app/screens/HcHesyWVri0/00-00-47.png) ![Screenshot at 1:06: The video transitions to the core question: "WHAT DOES MID ACTUALLY MEAN?"](https://ss.rapidrecap.app/screens/HcHesyWVri0/00-01-06.png) ![Screenshot at 2:37: Advantage #1 is introduced: 'THEY'RE APPROACHABLE', explained as a safe space where women don't feel they have to be perfect.](https://ss.rapidrecap.app/screens/HcHesyWVri0/00-02-37.png) ![Screenshot at 6:42: The speaker transitions to actionable advice with 'Number three: STOP CURATING EVERYTHING', urging men to post real content.](https://ss.rapidrecap.app/screens/HcHesyWVri0/00-06-42.png)